CCDA.

Early last Wednesday morning I hopped on a Greyhound to Minneapolis with three social work friends and one professor for the annual Christian Community Development Association conference. Trinity’s social work department sends students to CCDA every year, and this year my professor and a friend presented at the conference. I had heard great things about CCDA over the years and was strongly encouraged by other friends to go, so I decided I had to seize the opportunity for my senior year of college.

I’ll admit, the first evening of the conference was not a happy one for me. I had received some unexpected bad news on Monday night that will make it even more difficult for me to graduate on time. That coupled with the stress of AJ’s impending deployment and being away from him all the time made things really tough for me that night. Sometimes I really do feel as though I am being crushed under my cross and am not sure how much more I can take. As I headed downtown very early in the morning the next day to volunteer for several hours without breakfast or coffee, I was seriously questioning why I had even come (my friends and I chose to volunteer at the conference to save money. I spent a total of about 13.5 hours volunteering in three days. That’s a lot!).

Now before you start to feel sad, I will tell you that things went much better after Thursday morning. Once I really started to spend time exploring the city with friends and hearing amazing speakers talk about their passion for social justice, I was in my element. Being among such a large, diverse group of Christians from all kinds of backgrounds really nourished my spirit. I often feel frustrated or sad about the many divisions between American Christians of different denominations, so it was wonderful to see those barriers transcended this week.

It was so much fun getting to spend time with my classmates and professor outside of Trinity in a more relaxed environment. We all got to know each other better and now share lots of good memories. More than that, I loved having the chance to put my life on hold and do something that makes me happy. Honestly, the demands of AJ’s job on my entire life often cause me to lose my sense of identity. I do find joy in being a wife to AJ, and it is my dream, but being an Army wife consumes a lot of my energy. His responsibilities to the Army seem to almost always come first, so I sometimes forget who I am as just Hannah, not Hannah the Army wife. I love my husband more than anything in this world, but when I’m not able to be with him, it’s refreshing to enjoy other things I’m passionate about. CCDA really nourished my spirit and renewed my sense of who God has created me to be.